Do these shoes make my butt look big?

Whenever I tell people I’m a fashion stylist, one of the first things they always ask me is “What is the worst thing you’ve ever seen someone wear?” While I’ve certainly seen my share of tacky, wacky, downright frightening ensembles (after all, I take public transportation every day), there is one pervasive misstep I see among the women of New England: The Frankenstein Shoe. The clunky, square-toed, thick-heeled, black shoe whose allure completely escapes me.

Where are you ladies all going that you need such heavy footwear? Are you kicking around a construction site on your lunch break? Stomping on some grapes at your private vineyard? Doing some logging in between errands? Because unless your daily routine involves electrical hazard work, there is just no reason for sporting those clunkers.

“But they’re so comfortable!” is usually the protest I hear from my clients, as I’m tossing the offending shoes into the “donate” pile (those are the times I really wish I had Stacy & Clinton’s gleaming garbage can). Here’s the thing: those chunky shoes are making YOU look chunky as well. They’re adding a good 5 lbs. to your frame. You might be wearing a beautiful, flattering outfit, but when you add a chunky shoe at the end, it eliminates any chance of creating a long, lean silhouette. While I understand that not every woman shares my passion for 4 inch pointy toe stilettos, there is a wide variety of alternatives to the Frankenstein shoe that are just as comfortable, yet are infinitely more chic.

Compare the shoes above; your basic black “work shoe”. The clunker on the left is heavy and unfeminine. By contrast, the other two shoes, which still have a low heel, are so much lighter, cleaner, and feminine. Trading the shoes on the left for the ones on the right will automatically make you look sleeker. Look for shoes that have a round or pointed toe, instead of a square. If it’s flats you’re looking for, instead of a mannish, loafer style shoe, try a ballet flat, with feminine details like bows, flowers or beading. Or try a pointy-toe skimmer – they won’t pinch your toes, I promise, and the pointy toe lengthens your legs. My clients are always so surprised that the light, feminine shoes can be just as comfortable as the big, clunky ones.

So lighten up, and try a pair. Leave the construction work to your boyfriend.

- Jessica